Evening Personalities Target Trump's Controversial 'Gold Card' Immigration Program

Television's top comedians used their airtime ridiculing President Donald Trump's just announced visa initiative, dubbed the "gold card," characterizing it as a obvious pay-to-play scheme for the wealthy.

Stephen Colbert's Pointed Spin

Opening his broadcast, Stephen Colbert delivered a sardonic Christmas tune directed at the president. "He's making a list, checking it twice, before handing that list to the officials at ICE," he crooned. "Donald Trump ... spoils all he touches."

The focus was the controversial initiative that enables overseas citizens to purchase U.S. legal status for a sum of $1 million dollars, with a "premium" tier for $5 million. An official portal pledges processing "with unprecedented speed."

"A brief note for you to rich immigrants: before you fork over the cash, have you considered Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He noted that the scheme is also designed to "squeeze cash" from companies wanting to hire skilled workers, with hefty payments. "That is a lot of fees, however if you register, you also get two free nights at a property of your choosing – provided that it's the Tampa Marriott Bonvoy," he continued.

"Unprecedented screening the government has before done," stated Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to make sure these people completely qualify to be in America."

"That's important, you have to prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert said dryly. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Roast

On his own program, Jimmy Kimmel dubbed the visa program the "Get Into America Express Card."

"This is a card that will allow affluent foreigners to live here," he said. "In exchange for a million dollars, you get legal visitor status, you get a pathway to citizenship, and a president's pardon for one serious crime of your choosing."

"It might be time to change that poem on the Statue of Liberty – to hell with your huddled masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he added.

Kimmel mocked the lack of detail of the application, saying it is "tougher to start a Wordle account." He lamented that Trump "believes citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak."

"That's right, the finest people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you give the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers discussing Grocery Issues

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers turned to Trump's declining approval numbers during financial concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a second term since they were mad about the economy," he said.

Recently, in a bid to discuss affordability, Trump conducted a press conference in front of a array of food items, and behaved oddly to some cereal.

"Lovely packaging, I think I'm going to take some of them back to my cottage and have a lot of fun," Trump said. "Such as the Cheerios, I haven't seen Cheerios in a long time."

"He is so incredibly weird," Meyers reacted. "Like, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What's the plan with those Cheerios?"

Meyers finished by targeting right-leaning news arguments of Trump's economic performance. "Perhaps rather than voicing concerns, you should give him a shiny trophy like the one FIFA did," he joked.